Wednesday, December 12, 2007

pee-wee returns? dare i hope?

I hear that Paul Reubens may be coming out with a new Pee-Wee movie. "The time is ripe," he said. The public is ready for his triumphant return to the screen.

I know I am. I loved Pee-Wee's Playhouse back in the day. When I left Florida, my co-workers pitched in for my farewell presents: A pullstring Pee-Wee Herman doll and Chairry, to keep me company on my return to NJ.

Chairry has a mouth-slot between its cushions that you can move using a knobby thing in the back. In the show, Chairry was a rather uninspired and bland character, almost the moral center of the show. Playing with the moral center of a kids' show isn't much fun. I mean, it's a chair for pete's sake.

Pee-Wee, on the other hand, was fun to play with. He's stuffed, not bendable. Maybe 16 inches tall. At one point, he said "I know you are but what am I?" among other famous expressions.


Now, however, he sits in my lonely attic with Chairry, and when I pull his string he says "beeedeeebeedeeebeeddeeeee" in a very high-pitched whine. I should have taken better care of him so I could unload him on ebay, but the truth is: I could never part with him.

Sexual symbolism runs amok throughout the commercial, featuring a too-smiley 12-year-old kid, his banana-eating dad (or perhaps his "funny" uncle) and a bunch of monkeys in propeller hats. Honestly, though, I think Reubens got a bum rap in the movie theater. If getting caught masturbating in a porn theater is enough to get you thrown in jail (and isn't that the whole point of the porn theater, to provide a safe, secure and nurturing environment in which to "shoot one's wad"), surely that makes Pee-Wee the perfect presidential candidate.



2 comments:

Anonymous said...

How old do you think Paul is now? Wouldn't an old-guy Pee-Wee be a bit off-putting for the kiddies? Who'd want to watch it?
H.

carey said...

Uh, me. That'd be me. He's in his fifties, anyway.

Besides, young kids today don't know who Pee-Wee was, so they wouldn't care. If they'll go see creaky Tim Allen is some lame kiddie movie, no reason they wouldn't see a Pee-Wee movie, especially if Tim Burton directed.

He's talking about doing another movie, in which the Playhouse gang actually ventures outside to Puppet Land. Imagine the hijinks that ensue!


AH-hahahhahaha!