start of the second half

Day 1: If I had a nickel for every time I've heard someone say 50 is the new 30, I'd take all those goddamn nickels and hurl them violently at the person who coined the phrase.

Lots of folks have taken time out of their busy days to wish me a happy bday on Facebook, which is nice.

I took the day off from work, which is also nice, because work just sucks it.

I'm celebrating today by dropping my van off at the shop, so they can investigate this jerky phenomenon in what I believe is the transmission. But I know about as much about cars as I do about quantum physics, so it's probably just a dead cat stuck in the engine.

Later, the ladies and I are lunching. Somewhere. We don't know when or where. That's how we roll.

Then Jeremy might have a game, depending on the weather. The most important game of the season! So I won't be needing that birthday manicure, for I will have chewed all my nails off.

I'm off to bathe and have the birthday. I'll be back.

minutes after 50

Ok, wow. It's 47 minutes after 12 a.m, June 16. And I am now officially 50 years old.

Yeah. Doesn't quite roll off the tongue, does it?

Fifty. The other f-word.

Your tongue is barely involved with that word, it's all teeth and lips, sharp consonant edges and harsh air. Lends itself well to cursing.

Because I am now officially 50, I am suddenly old and sleepy and I'm not going to drone on here, now at 12:55, about the angst, the regret, and the aches and pains of middle age. No, I'll save that for a book. A funny book. A darkly funny book that chronicles the year after 50. Maybe with cartoons. And I'll use some of this blog stuff. I can do that, right?

So folks will know that 50 sucks, but it's manageable. Perhaps, if I say it here, on my very little-read little public blog...maybe I'll be compelled to really do it.

OK?